


bridge over troubled water

by thunderylee



Category: KAT-TUN (Band), Kanjani8 (Band)
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-21
Updated: 2013-01-21
Packaged: 2019-01-16 21:27:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12350958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderylee/pseuds/thunderylee
Summary: Ueda has feelings about turning thirty and finds comfort in the least likely person.





	bridge over troubled water

**Author's Note:**

> reposted from agck.

Of all the people to show up at the bridge that night, it had to be Ryo.

“What are you even doing here,” Ueda deadpans, too unimpressed to even lift his voice in question.

“Walking,” Ryo answers simply. Hands in his pockets, expressionless face—well, from what Ueda can see of it, anyway. He’s wearing a scarf, but his hair is stuffed under a ski cap and his eyes are strong.

Something about those eyes has Ueda dropping his guard. They’re not seventeen anymore, after all. “Do you often lurk by bridges like a troll?”

“Trolls live under bridges,” Ryo informs him, and Ueda can swear he sees the corners of Ryo’s eyes crinkle in amusement. “It’s entirely possible that I just happened to be passing by the same place where you’re standing around angsting, you know.”

“I’m not angsting,” Ueda protests. “I’m relaxing.”

“If this is relaxing, you suck at it,” Ryo says. “You’re so tense right now that _my_ blood pressure is going up.”

Ueda sighs. “Sorry. Just wasn’t expecting to run into anyone I know here.”

“I can leave.” Ryo shrugs. “Or I can buy you a drink and you can tell me what’s on your mind.”

Ueda raises an eyebrow, and Ryo laughs.

“You can pay for your own drink, if you prefer.”

“I appreciate the offer, but bars really aren’t my scene,” Ueda replies.

“Who said anything about a bar?” Ryo asks. “I live a few streets away. I was actually on my way home. So stop being a brat and angst somewhere warm.”

“I’m not angsting,” Ueda repeats, but he turns around as Ryo starts walking away. “Hey, where are you going?”

“Follow me if you want, I don’t care either way,” Ryo says without looking over his shoulder. “We’re not seventeen anymore, Ueda.”

Ueda blinks at Ryo’s retreating back before rolling his eyes and jogging to catch up with him. “I know that.”

“You’re turning thirty this year, aren’t you?” Ryo asks, and Ueda stops in his tracks. “Ah, right, that’s what’s got you angsting.”

Ueda gives up trying to argue with him; besides, the little bastard is right. “I just thought I’d be married by now, you know? And not just because I knocked someone up.”

Ryo scoffs. “Jin is doing well, thanks for asking. I have baby pictures in my wallet, but you’ll have to wait until we get back. It’s fucking cold out here.”

“It’s not _that_ cold,” Ueda mutters, feeling some sense of familiarity bantering with this person like this. It’s been a good number of years since they’ve worked together, but paths cross often in this industry and things don’t really change.

At some point he had started walking again, and was now falling into step with Ryo. They walk similarly, Ueda notices. Ueda’s not that tall himself, so they move at the same speed. Not too fast, not too slow. Comfortable.

“Thanks,” Ueda says when Ryo unlocks his front door and gestures grandly for Ueda to come inside. He’s not sure what he expected Ryo’s home to look like, but it looks like a regular apartment with a sectional couch around a small coffee table, in front of a large entertainment center that looks like it’s rarely used. On the other side of the room there’s a small dining table with four chairs, one of which is fastened with a high chair.

“Jin brings the kid with him every time he comes over, so it’s easier just to leave it there,” Ryo explains, and Ueda just nods. “My sister is expecting again, though, so it’ll be useful for that as well.”

“Congratulations,” Ueda says. “My sister just got married last year, so I’m still waiting to be an uncle.”

“It’s awesome.” Ryo whips off his scarf to reveal a giant grin. “I’m practically an uncle to Luna-chan, too. At least I spoil her like she’s my own niece. Oh, here are her pictures.”

Ueda can’t help but smile when he looks at Jin’s eyes on a tiny baby girl, though she has Meisa’s facial features. “She’s beautiful.”

“You should tell him that yourself,” Ryo says pointedly. “He hasn’t moved, you know.”

“I don’t hate him,” Ueda answers the implied accusation. “We just don’t live in the same world anymore.”

“I am pretty sure you and I live in the same world,” Ryo says as he disappears into the kitchen, “and I can keep in touch with him just fine.”

“You weren’t in a group with him for ten years,” Ueda points out.

“I keep in touch with NEWS, too. All seven of them.”

Ryo has him there, and he knows it as he presents Ueda with a beer.

“Since you’re in my apartment,” Ryo goes on, “I don’t feel guilty about giving you my unsolicited, probably unwelcome opinion, which is that you’re jealous of Jin because he has a family now.”

Ueda just takes a swig of the beer, keeping his eyes on Ryo as he swallows. “It’s not worth the backlash he got for it, though.”

“In your eyes, maybe.” Ryo points at the picture with his bottle. “Honestly, I don’t think anyone would give a flying fuck if you got married and popped out some kids. Maybe they would if it were Kamenashi, but let’s face it, that man is married to his job.”

Ueda certainly can’t argue with that. “It’s not that easy for me,” he says.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s either the crazy fangirls or the stuck-up models.” Ryo flops down in the middle of the sectional and motions for Ueda to take a seat as well. “You’re preaching to the choir there.”

Ueda must be making an interesting face, because Ryo bursts out laughing. “What?”

“Crazy fan _boys_ , whatever,” Ryo adds with a wink. “It’s all the same.”

“It really is,” Ueda agrees, neither confirming nor denying, and they both take a drink at the same time.

Ryo turns on the television and flips through the channels, pausing on Aiba’s new drama and gazing fondly at his senpai.

“The last of Arashi are going to be thirty this year and none of them are angsting about getting married,” Ryo says.

“Because they’re already married to each other,” Ueda replies, and Ryo snorts. “It’s not even the marriage part I care about, really.”

“Is your biological clock ticking?” Ryo asks seriously, and Ueda rolls his eyes. “Look, you’re not the only one, you know? You would have thought we all had ovaries with how ridiculous we got over that kid on the set of Patch Uppers. And they keep giving me father roles! It’s like shoving right into my face what I can’t have.”

Ueda grunts. “That’s the worst.”

“But it’s okay, you know?” Ryo goes on, then takes another swig of his beer. “Like, I’m working hard now so I can spend more time with my family later, whenever that may be. Sure, I’d like to be a dad off camera, but it hasn’t happened for me yet, and it’s not like it will _never_ happen, so there’s no point in angsting over it.”

“I feel like it will never happen,” Ueda grumbles. “It just seems like everything I do is for nothing because it’s all for myself. I have nothing to contribute to future generations, no one to teach.”

“What would you even teach, anyway?” Ryo asks, holding up his bottle in mock surrender when Ueda cuts his eyes over toward him. “No, I get what you’re saying. But think about if you did have a kid now, how much you’d have to leave it with someone else while you work. And when you _are_ home, you’d be too tired to really play with it. Especially the first couple years, trust me, you really want to be there. They grow up so fast.”

Ueda’s face softens as he thinks about Ryo’s words. “I guess you’re right.”

“Do you feel better?” Ryo asks.

“Not really,” Ueda answers, and they both laugh. It’s louder than it should be as they reach the bottom of their bottles, which Ryo grabs and replaces with fresh ones. They talk about lighter things then, mostly making fun of their respective bandmates and Shige, until there are a considerable number of beer bottles littering the table and Ueda’s slumping down on this incredibly comfortable couch.

“Hey,” Ryo says, and Ueda turns his head to find Ryo equally as slumped on the next cushion. “Just because you can’t settle down yet doesn’t mean you have to be alone.”

Ueda blinks at him. “What are you offering?”

“Whatever I don’t have to move for,” Ryo says, and Ueda stares at him. “Don’t look so surprised. This was inevitable, wasn’t it?”

“Was it?” Ueda asks, feeling like he’s drunk a whole case of beer for how lost he is.

“Of course,” Ryo says, like it’s obvious, almost as obvious as the way he scoots closer to Ueda. Ueda feels mildly victorious since Ryo had _just said_ he didn’t want to move. “Childhood enemies grow up and find common ground as middle-aged men—”

“We are not middle aged,” Ueda interrupts him, but Ryo just grins over at him. “And where in that trope does it say we have a drunken hookup?”

“I added that part,” Ryo says, lifting his hand to grab Ueda’s collar with a shaky fist. “I know you want to, because you haven’t left yet.”

Ueda gives a short laugh despite himself. “I’m not desperate, Ryo.”

“Me neither,” Ryo says. “Now that we’ve established that, fucking kiss me already.”

It’s really the sharp pull on Ueda’s collar that has him actually doing it, but that’s all the push he needs to press his lips against Ryo’s. Ryo’s hand relocates to the back of Ueda’s jaw and tilts his head, kissing him so hard that Ueda’s mind spins from something other than the alcohol. It’s easy, mindless, the twist of arousal sparking inside him at the first lick of Ryo’s tongue.

Gravity shifts and Ueda feels hard muscles and sharp bones beneath him, belatedly realizing he’d crawled all the way across the couch to lay Ryo down onto it. Ryo stretches out beneath him and wraps arms around his back, so it must be fine with him, though Ueda is past the point of worry as he takes out his frustration on Ryo’s mouth. A faint noise sounds from the back of Ryo’s throat and Ueda realizes it’s a moan, leading him to drop his hands to Ryo’s waist and slip them under the plain cotton T-shirt, feeling Ryo’s abs tighten from the contact.

Things happen on their own, Ryo’s hot skin quivering under Ueda’s touch as they pull at each other’s clothes, kissing the whole way through. Despite the winter cold, Ueda feels even warmer without his shirt and lowers his mouth to Ryo’s throat, fingers hesitating on Ryo’s belt.

Ryo gives a short laugh and Ueda pulls back enough to glare at him. “I had planned on fucking your angst away, but it looks like you want it the other way.”

“Sorry,” Ueda says, only meaning it a little bit when Ryo arches under his firm grind downward. “I’m a little aggressive.”

“Fine with me,” Ryo agrees, and Ueda blinks at what this means. “Do whatever you need to, it’s okay.”

“You’re being awfully nice,” Ueda says skeptically, but it doesn’t stop him from unbuckling Ryo’s belt. “Is there a catch or something?”

Ryo rolls his eyes. “Of course not. I just like getting laid. So you better make it good.”

Instead of replying verbally, Ueda descends upon Ryo’s mouth with a searing kiss, one that distracts Ueda enough to lower the zipper of Ryo’s pants and reach inside. Ryo’s gasp tickles his tongue and it’s empowering to feel Ryo’s cock harden in his hand, hips rocking up for more. Ryo responds to him so shamelessly that it has Ueda getting hotter, using his other hand to shove Ryo’s pants down over his ass that he helpfully lifts.

“Do you have anything?” Ueda mumbles against Ryo’s lips, and Ryo nods as he reaches for his wallet, where he fishes out a condom and a travel-size packet of lube. “How convenient.”

“I’m a rather heat-of-the-moment person,” Ryo says by way of explanation, though he doesn’t seem keen on elaborating as he lifts his knees the minute his pants are off.

That’s fine with Ueda, because he’s pretty much done talking as he squeezes the lube onto his fingers and pushes them between Ryo’s legs. This is always the awkward part, at least in Ueda’s experience, but Ryo’s body seems to welcome him right in and Ueda doesn’t believe for one second that Ryo would fuck anything that could fuck him instead. He’s incredibly responsive, too, soft moans dying on Ueda’s lips as his hips snap even more sharply. It has Ueda groaning as well, rocking against Ryo’s thigh until Ryo reaches down to take him in hand.

His grip is firm and more confident than it should be when touching someone for the first time. To be fair, Ueda’s nudging a second finger inside him and moving them in and out, probably not leaving much room for apprehension in Ryo’s mind. Ueda loves it, the boldness of it all, how nothing matters but the two of them rutting against each other like animals, reality a bit diluted from a mixture of beer and raw passion.

Ueda gets in a third finger and Ryo pushes back against them, trembling with need and Ueda understands the sentiment exactly with the way he pushes through the funnel of Ryo’s fingers. Their kissing becomes breathy and they should probably stop, but Ueda can’t bring himself to pull away just as much as Ryo clearly can’t keep his tongue inside his own mouth.

Then Ryo’s rolling a condom onto him and nudging his hand away, as blatantly obvious as he can be without speaking the words. Ueda prefers it that way, but not because he doesn’t like Ryo’s voice—he _really_ likes Ryo’s voice, especially the choked noise he makes as Ueda enters him. Ueda falls out of their kiss in the process, but it’s a small price to pay for feeling Ryo hot and tight all around him, accepting him all the way inside like it’s not the first time Ueda’s been there. He has no doubt that Ryo does this often with others, but something about their union feels incredibly specialized.

“Don’t hold back,” Ryo whispers, and Ueda’s hips snap like they’d just been waiting for permission to unleash their fury. Ueda didn’t realize how much frustration he’d had pent up until he takes it out on Ryo’s ass, looping his arms around Ryo’s knees to hit him hard and deep. Ryo loves it, if his sharp cries are any indication, and Ueda loses himself in the tension that starts to overpower his consciousness with each thrust.

“Ueda,” Ryo gasps, and Ueda frowns at the interruption until he realizes that Ryo’s just _saying his name_.

“You should use my first name when I’m inside you,” Ueda teases him, though it comes out much more strongly than he’d intended.

It serves the purpose when Ryo clutches onto Ueda’s shoulder blades with both hands and leans up to hiss in his ear, “ _Tatsuya_.”

A shiver courses down Ueda’s spine, and it just makes him fuck Ryo harder as he doesn’t bother to ask first. “Ryo.”

He swears Ryo tightens around him more at that, though it may just be the sound of his voice; either way, everything gets so much hotter, and Ueda doesn’t know how much longer he can last. He manages to gain control of his right hand enough to shove it between them, taking hold of Ryo’s cock and stroking as firmly as he dares, and this time Ryo’s muscles are definitely squeezing him, pulling a low groan from his lungs.

“I’m gonna come,” Ryo warns, but it just makes Ueda fist him harder, taking his moans even higher until Ueda feels it spill over his fingers. That plus the increasing suffocation of his own cock has him following right behind, only getting in a few more sharp thrusts before orgasm takes him over.

Afterwards, it’s so quiet that their breathing seems too loud, but Ryo doesn’t shove at him or otherwise indicate that Ueda needs to get the fuck off of him. Quite the opposite, actually, as he stretches out his legs with only a little cringe and seems to settle comfortably beneath Ueda. His grip on Ueda’s back loosens, but doesn’t disappear at all, and when Ueda finds the energy to lift his head, Ryo’s back in his mouth like he had never left.

It’s impossible to catch your breath while kissing, so Ueda doesn’t even try and just remains lightheaded, figuring this is the best thing to do to prolong the inevitable aftermath. Except when Ryo finally pulls back, gasping for air like he’d almost drowned, he flashes Ueda a lazy grin and folds his arms behind his head.

“Do you feel better _now_?” he asks pointedly.

“Actually, yes,” Ueda replies. “I can’t quite find the energy to move yet, though.”

“We all make sacrifices,” Ryo says airily, and while he probably intends it as a joke, Ueda feels that this one statement can apply to his entire life.

Eventually he sits up, no remorse in watching Ryo walk toward his bathroom completely naked with a slight limp, and he’s only made it back into his boxers by the time Ryo returns in a pair of sweatpants.

“Stay the night,” Ryo says, and Ueda ignores the warmth that floods him as he nods. “Tomorrow I’m going to hang out with Jin and the kid while Meisa works. You’re welcome to come with me.”

Ueda must be making a face, because Ryo gives him a stern look and Ueda wonders when that one started having an effect on his decisions-. “Okay, okay,” he gives in.

It’s not until much later, when they’re huddled under Ryo’s covers with Ryo curled up to Ueda’s chest, that Ryo adds, “Luna-chan really is the cutest. She gives you no choice but to fall in love with her.”

As Ueda considers his life choices, particularly the ones he doesn’t have a say in, he has a feeling that Jin’s daughter isn’t the only one who will have that affect on him.


End file.
